Friday, April 10, 2009

A Curriculum Vitae for the Future

For Rent:

Semi-autonomous organic machine, useful for almost any physical task. Recently acquired clerical & research-dedicated programming. Operating system and memory based on an bio-electric processor and Electrically Erasable Programmable Read-Only Memory.

All commands can be entered verbally. Programming can be accomplished through visual, tactile and auditory inputs. Data transfer rate of four to twelve words per second, depending on a variety of variables.

Flexible fuel compatibility allows the unit to be run on any number of biological and organic materials. Fuel efficiency and processing power can be increased by the catalyst C8H10N4O2 known colloquially as caffeine.

Operating System has some quirks and operates on a paradigm basis and sometimes will have difficulty with verbal commands if they violate previous assumptions about the operational environment. Both the Operating System and the unit itself require regular rest and cannot be operated indefinitely. Brief pauses every few hours followed by a longer pause after 8 to 12 hours of operation are required in order to ensure the unit's continued efficient operation.

Asking rental price: 11$-25$ per hour of operation, depending on the nature of the task required.